Joy

Let me try to tell you what it's like.

I come from a lineage of artists and creatives on my maternal line. Most influential on my life creatively is my grandma Medy (https://www.medystudio.com/), a professional artist, Renaissance woman in all ways, Mystic (although I doubt she would label herself as such), and classically trained pianist (at Juliard - naturally).

Why it is so f*cking hard to relate, rupture, and repair with a Beloved?

In a recent journey deep into the depths of my DNA, I found the moment I learned it wasn’t safe to be soft.

In February of 2020, I quite suddenly lost vision.

It's the place in my life where I experience the most deep, dense work and the most bliss and joy.

It shows me the places I am not yet free.

And at the same time, it is the place I am the most free.

To be as wild, silly, powerful, chaotic, nurturing, sexual, and sweet as I am.

The destructive force of the Goddess is pure love.

She doesn't give a f*ck about the collateral of the small self and my life. She doesn't care about Shelby and yet she cares so much about Liberation of all from the confines of the Ego.

She only sees Liberation and Sovereignty and Truth.

She sees Me. Whatever that means.

She is me. And you. And we are her. And she is us.

The slow burn of our friendship began when we met on a mountain top in Santa Fe with our shared mentor. I sat on the couch overlooking a gorgeous overpass thinking to myself, "This is nice, but why am I here?"

When I returned to Sedona, I began working with Ashley as a practitioner for Ancestral Lineage Healing. "Ah, that's the karma. Great!"

We made progress on healing my 4 lines and I was introduced to a brand new View of the world and life through her transmission and ritual guidance.

I remember thinking to myself, "Wow, this b*tch is powerful."

She not so secretly resented men. For making it so that she could not indeed be a woman. Not in this world. Not now.

"F*ck men," she would think. "They have it so easy."

And f*ck men she did.

Because even though she pretended to subscribe to the popular idea that "all men are trash," she knew deep down she needed them, or him, or one, or maybe all of them.

The primordial longing for support of the masculine persisted.

Shoutout Arizona interviews Shelby about how her business is helping heal locals & the world at large.